Back to the bump and grind…

Well after a couple of eventful days weatherwise, we are back to normal. I actually had class tonight, and had my first quiz. I know I missed at least one question (hopefully that’s it!) I have started reading the Mitford series by Jan Karon. I’ve been seeing ‘blips’ on this series for over a year now, so I figured I would try it out. It seems like sometimes the universe keeps pointing things out to me repeatedly until I pay attention (this book is one of them!) I first noticed it being reviewed on Good Morning America, then it was recommended on a readers group I belong to, then I saw it mentioned in a couple of blogs and so on and so forth. So I give into the universe and maybe it will quiet down for a while DS was acting oddly today…He barely ate, and slept from about 4:30 on. He doesn’t have a fever, so I’m hoping it was maybe just a blah day. (Do two year olds have blah days?) I’m really really ready for spring. I’m just getting all discombobulated (I love that word ) I have no motivation for anything. I don’t want to clean, read, do homework. If I could get away with it I would meld with my recliner till March. For instance, am I trying to decipher tonights Stats lecture? Nope I’m sitting here typing for you good people. In stitching news, I am almost finished with my first project of 2004. You can see what it should look like here: Twinkle It’s really cute, and reminds me of one of my online friends Well I think I’ve put off homework long enough!

Colors..

Saw this on Prinn’s blog, I got blue =)

BLUE You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive. Find out your color at Quiz Me!

Secrets…

I’ve got one!! and I’m about to burst I want to tell someone so badly, but that would ruin it!!ARGHHH!

The Time Has Come….

The time has come,” the Walrus said,

“To talk of many things:

Of shoes- and ships- and sealing wax-

Of cabbages- and kings—

And why the sea is boiling hot-

And whether pigs have wings.”

I love this poem, and Lewis Carrol It fits my mood tonight. I’m in a very “Alice In Wonderland” mood. I have seen several stitchers entries on the state of the union, and all I’ve got to say is bah. I liked Prinn’s notion best (see Perle Moon) in that she has her opinion and it’s not worth arguing over…I agree. I have my opinion and no one is going to change that. Nope not going to publish it here, cuz I don’t even want to discuss it. =)

In other news =) a stitcher from the TWBB really made my night tonight. It seems kind of silly that something as simple as an e-mail can perk up my day. She said she really respected all that I’m juggling right now (which almost made me laugh considering how much she has on her plate!!) It came at just the right time, because I was starting to get down about how chaotic my life is. Deep down I know school is worth it, I really love going. It makes me feel alive to be fed all of this information. I have this niggling little voice that sits in the back of my head giving me doubts, making me second guess myself. Luckily, I have a *very* supportive husband, and all of the people on the TWBB are incredibly supportive!

I had my stats class tonight, I think I’m going to hurt my teacher The last class she had, she went very fast (which I love!) This class, she went sooooo slow I had to fight to stay awake. Now this is the meek little mouse teacher, so she is either finally getting comfortable with this class, or someone complained about the lightning fast pace. A part of me disagrees with it if someone complained. This is college, if you can’t meet the standards you shouldn’t be there. It sounds kind of harsh to put it that way, but I always thought that once you reached college the days of classes being taught to the lowest commondenominatorr were over. You could either do it, or you couldn’t. I don’t mean to sound cruel here. The last thing I want is to imply I’m superior to anyone. I probably just have a skewed view of higher education =) Completely possible as my views are always slightly off, it’s part of my charm darn it!

I’d like to ponder the joys of my two year old for a moment =) He polyurethaned my monitor today. How did he get polyurethane you ask? Well my husband does wood burning, and uses an oil based polyurethane to protect the results. He had a work area set up in our dining room (which we never use as a dining room, long story) The dining room is onlyaccessiblee when I’m in the kitchen, we keep it blocked off at all other times. Well my too smart for his own good son, snuck in the dining room while I was fixing dinner, stole the polyurethane (in a spray can) and snuck upstairs to the den. I went searching when the house got quiet (always a sign of trouble with a toddler) and wah lah….schellacked monitors. Moral of the story folks….Rubbingalcoholl does remove oil based polyurethanes from monitors…. Thank you Wendy =) We got the boys hair cut this weekend and he looks so much older!! It amazes me how much he has grown. A part of me is so proud of the big boy he is becoming, and another part of me wants to keep him my baby forever. Oh well the joys of being amommye. Well I better run, as DH wants my computer (yay *I* have the good puter now =) )

Things I love.

Since my last couple of entries were me bi*ching I thought I would list some things I love…

I love that if my son is hurt or upset, I am the one he runs to.

I love that my husband got me flowers, just because I made Dean’s List.

I love that my anniversary is coming up and just about a week.

I love that I’m in school.

I love the Wendy’s Chicken BLT salad.

I love the way my son cuddles.

I love the way he makes *me* put him in bed.

I love being close to my mom.

I love financial aid checks in the mail.

I love that my mom thinks my cross stitch is beautiful.

I love the fact that I woke up this morning (even if it was way too early!)

I love the fact that even though it’s cold enough to freeze a well digger’s rear off, the sun is shining.

I love my poor little rosebush that I planted last summer.

I love the blue of a sky in the middle of summer.

I love that my husband spoils me rotton =)

I love to remember all that I have, instead of dwelling on all that I don’t.

More Changes…

Ok, the last template was just too upbeat for my current mood, so I’m changing again =) This is much more subdued and fits my mid-winter blues….adjustments still to be made.

Snow

I’m so tired. I’m tired of winter, of having no colors, of the gray salt splattered view of the world. I’m tired of being cold. I really need to move someplace warmer. If I could find somewhere where the average temperature (except for Christmas Day) is about 75 I would be in heaven. Of course I still want my white Christmas =)

DH and I bought Bruce Allmighty yesterday. I *loved* it. It was so funny and still wasn’t fluffy. I had my first full day of weekend classes on Saturday also. I think I’m a glutton for punishment. I also forsee my blogging and internet time diminishing quickly (not to mention stitching.)

We’ve bought our first pack of ‘training’ pants for DS, he had an accident last night (expected) but has done well so far today, lets keep our fingers crossed!

I’m better now

I’ve had my first ‘real’ class with Dr. Intimidation, and as usual (get ready to be shocked here folks) I’ve probably overreacted. I really do like the way he teaches. I even spoke up in class a couple times, and he didn’t tell me I was stupid once! We had to choose three stories in order of preference for our presentation. I chose Wuthering Heights, Hedda Gabler by Ibsen, and Stories from the Underground by Doesteyevsky (I think….) So if anyone has read these and has insights, don’t be shy, let me know! Personally I hope I get Wuthering Heights, for a couple of reasons…1. I’ve read it before so I’m familiar with the work and 2. It’s not slated to be presented on untill after spring break so I get to see how the others present their pieces and I get to put off doing it as long as possible =) Bonnie putting something off? No…..not me!! I’m the queen of promptness and punctuality…Now I’ll take your leave before you choke on your beverage…

A Time for Reflection

I seem to be dwelling a lot on the past lately. Or my past keeps coming up to get me =) I spent a good amount of time yesterday talking to an old friend of mine, E. E and I dated when we were 16, and ended up becoming really great friends. We were roommates together when I moved back to Chicago, he stood up in my wedding with me, asked me to stand up is his (I had just had my son, was nursing and couldn’t travel at that point =) ) That’s the thing I miss the most about being here, my best friends are in Chi-town. There is nothing like a really old friend. They know everything there is to know about you, you don’t have to explain things, they like your weirdness. It’s like a pair of sneakers you’ve had forever, they just fit. The blog posting yesterday also got me to thinking, I’ve met most of the important people in my life over the internet. I met E. in one of those old text chatboards, I met J. through him. Let me tell you, if you ever need a drinking buddy and you are in Chicago, let me know. J. is the best drinking buddy (It also helps if you have a passion for mediocre cover bands) I met DH through ICQ. I think I love the internet just because I am so painfully shy in person. I just never say the ‘right’ thing, so usually end up saying nothing at all. That is of course until I get to know you and then you can’t shut me up! My dad always used to tell me he should have named me Brooke, because I babble like one =P Oh and I’ve figured out what I like about getting older. I’m finally getting comfortable in my own skin. I’m a geek…not a techno geek, but a good old fashioned geek, I’m tubby (or fluffy or whatever term is P.C. today) and I don’t mind. I’m never going to look like a model, my husband thinks I’m sexy and that’s all that counts. Ok I do kind of wish that I didn’t gain a majority of the weight in my tummy, cuz the perpetually pregnant look isn’t the image I’m going for but I don’t hate it enough to do crunches. Like I told my friend Wendy, until they make exercise bikes out of chocolate, I’m not buying. I’m smart, and I like it I’m going back to school, and this time I’m the idiot waving her hand and oh ohing at the teacher because I’m *proud* I know the answer. Hey for a while there I thought the pregnancy brain had evolved into permanent baby brain. If you remember the commercial that shows the woman wandering around with her infant all day, talking baby talk and later that night at the opera, she just can’t stop, That’s what I was turning into. That’s another thing…I used to be this ‘tough’ chick. I didn’t really cry, I was cynical, I was jaded (at least I thought I was) Then I had a baby and these wonderful things called hormones. Now two and a half years later I cry at hallmark commercials. I thought the hormones were supposed to go away!!! Oh and don’t even come near me during PMS, I cry at *everything*! Songs, commercials, silly movies of the week. I try not to I just can’t help it!! ARGH!!! And on that note I think I’ll collect whatever shreds of sanity I still posses and move on One Last note (if you’ve managed to muddle through all this!!) I really enjoy the comments, so please feel free to leave em =)

Thinking….

I was reading a post in a blog from another member of a crossstitch board I read, and it started me to thinking. It was about temporary friends. I’ve had a lot of those. And I (much like the writer of the original post) tend to wonder what’s wrong with me that people keep drifting away. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s not me. It’s the fact that as close as we seem to get on others from the internet, we never truely know them. It’s always easier to walk away from something that isn’t in the physical world. It still hurts when it happens though. When I was young, my mom always used to tell me, “If they don’t like you it’s their loss.” I always dismissed that as it was just mom drivel, but the older I get the more it strikes home. I am a nice person, with a worthwhile point of view. If someone doesn’t want my friendship, that’s fine. I do have friends who value me, I have a husband who adores me, and I’m pretty sure my two year old thinks I’m a god So I’m ok, you’re ok, we’re all ok!